Minister Matt Kean Volunteers Suburban Backyard for Gigantic Wind Turbine Installation
In a stunning turn of events, Minister Matt Kean, the mastermind behind the renewable energy zones in country NSW, has decided to take full responsibility for the logistical nightmare caused by the transportation of massive wind turbines. In a move that has left locals gobsmacked and birds frantically seeking alternate flight paths, Kean has announced his plan to install these colossal turbines right in his own suburban backyard.
With blades stretching as long as 90 meters and diameters almost reaching 7 meters, these wind turbine contraptions have proven to be a transport challenge, requiring the demolition or bypassing of bridges and underpasses. The estimated cost of over $340 million for the necessary infrastructure upgrades was nothing short of staggering. However, it seems Minister Kean has taken a rather creative approach to solving this predicament.
Flanked by confused but enthusiastic neighbors, Kean declared, “Why inconvenience the good people of country NSW and spend a fortune on infrastructure when I have the perfect solution? My backyard!”
Indeed, the suburbs surrounding Kean’s residence were never meant to be a renewable energy zone. However, the Minister’s unmatched commitment to the cause has led him to offer up his personal property as the ideal location for the wind turbine installation. As we all know, the bigger the turbine, the bigger the impact, and what better way to showcase the potential of renewable energy than right in Minister Kean’s own backyard?
Witnessing this bold move, local residents were torn between admiration and apprehension. On one hand, having these towering structures amidst the neatly trimmed hedges and perfectly manicured lawns is undoubtedly a sight to behold. On the other hand, concerns were raised about the impact on property values, the relentless noise disrupting afternoon tea sessions, and the risk of losing stray footballs in the wind turbine vortex.
When questioned about the potential inconvenience to his family, Minister Kean shrugged off any concerns, stating, “It’s a small price to pay for progress. Plus, the kids will finally have something to talk about at school other than dad’s virtue signalling.”
The installation of these monstrous wind turbines in a suburban backyard is expected to attract a wave of tourists, drawn by the sheer audacity of Minister Kean’s decision. Dubbed the “Kean Wind Park,” it will undoubtedly become a landmark of eccentricity, capturing the hearts and minds of locals and international visitors alike.
While some may view this move as a desperate attempt to divert attention from the logistical failures of the renewable energy zones, others see it as a testament to Minister Kean’s unwavering dedication to the cause. After all, who needs traditional infrastructure when you can transform your backyard into a renewable energy utopia?
Minister Matt Kean’s decision to install massive wind turbines in his suburban backyard will undoubtedly leave a lasting impression on the renewable energy landscape. With his innovative approach to problem-solving, Kean has shown us that sometimes the best solution lies right in our own backyards, or in his case, in his own backyard.
